You Told Me To Be Me

(This is how I want him to dress.)

My son, Kendall Beck, is nine years old and for as long as I can remember, I've always told him to be himself.  No matter what others do.  No matter is he's made fun of.  I've taught him to stand up for what he knows is right regardless of others.  I've had countless conversations with him about making sure he makes good decisions.  I've explained that his friends may make bad decisions and at some point in life, he will have to decide if those friendships are worth the trouble.  I am his mother and I want to protect him.  I want to protect him from those that may be cruel.  I want to protect him from those that may lead him down the wrong path.  I want him to understand that kids (and adults) can be very mean and that life isn't always fun.  As we have these conversations, I remind him over and over to just be Kendall.

Well, sometimes I eat my words.  My son also likes to wear his pants over his belly button.  Do you remember Steve Urkel?  If not, google him.  That would be my son.  During baseball season, he would walk out of our house with his pants all the way up to his armpits.  I would laugh, but cringle inside, and tell him that he better knock the ball out of the park if he was going to wear his pants that high.  But once again, I said go ahead.  If that's how you want to wear your pants, just do it.  If that's you, then by all means... be you.  (I'm not quite sure if I meant those words at the time.)  I want to protect him and I know kids will make fun of him.  But if he is aware of this, then it will just make him tough.  At least that's what I tell myself.

(Just an example of his style...check out the socks with the sliders!)

My little boy has a personality of his own.  Which most kids do...but I try to let his personality be seen and heard over what I want.  Which is what I keep telling myself but do I really? 

I was raised by a coach.  My brother was an All-star athlete.  I was a runner. 

My son has played ball since the age of 4.  He didn't have a choice.  It's what I wanted him to do because that's all I knew.  I told myself if he ever wanted to quit...then I would let him.  Just not during the season.  We aren't quitters and I refuse to raise a quitter. 

So when my child decides to do something that's not related to sports... I must admit... I want to tell him no.  I have this image of my son and that's what he should be... right?  WRONG!

The other day, I was talking to my son about school.  I wanted to know everything about the day and also who he played with at recess.  He started naming names... I then asked about some other boys and  asked why he doesn't ever play with them.  He gave me his reasons and then said this... "You told me to be me."  WOW!  He does listen and at that moment... I realized that it's time to stop trying to mold him into someone he is not.  God created him exactly how he wanted him to be and I do not need to interfere AT ALL. 

We are all YOUnique.  I need to embrace these moments.  I need to encourage the things my child loves.  I'm not sure about the Urkel pants... but at least everything else.

  May I never hinder who God intended him to be.