We are all guilty. We are all guilty of complaining about the things we don't have in life. Maybe some of us gripe more than others but I would say we all have our days.
As a single mom, one thing I notice is so many wives complaining about their husbands. "All he does is work, eat, sleep and hunt. He don't even take out the garbage." I realize that isn't proper English but have you ever heard similar words? Let me give you an example. I was at a friend's house several years ago (if you are reading this, stop complaining ha) when she came storming in the kitchen mad as a hornet because her husband had deleted all of her TV shows that she had recorded. I mean MAD. Let me paint you a picture of my life at this time. My little boy's daddy was in jail. I had no man in the house except my little boy and I had been through some really tough times fighting for the love of my life. What right did she have to actually COMPLAIN about her husband deleting her shows? I mean, God forbid we miss a few TV shows. You see, this man was a hard-working man. He was one that provided for his family while his wife stayed at home. He was a Godly man but made a tiny mistake and his wife blew up. She saw what he "did or didn't do" and chose to focus on the situation at hand when I would have loved for my husband to accidently delete my TV shows. If that's the worst part of your day, consider yourself blessed. I left that night sad. Sad because this friend was so upset over something so small. Something that didn't matter at all. I wanted to sit down with her and tell her what she did have. I wanted to share with her what I longed for and what I didn't have in my life. How I would love to see a trash full of garbage but a man full of God.
I'm not going to just focus on the married wives who complain about their husbands because I have seen single moms complain as well. I see every single day someone complain about their kids "dead beat dad." I hear or see the words, "if he would just step up and be a man" or "he doesn't even pay child support." It's easy to make ourselves the victim and have a pity party. We may even have legit reasons to "complain" but what is the point? Why can't we focus on what we do have in life? Quit having a pity party for one and celebrate the good in life. I guess when you have journeyed as a single mom, these things stand out. When someone complains about their husband when they are beyond blessed. When someone complains about their children's father when they are beyond blessed. People who complain about the very thing that someone else is praying for. Husband didn't take out the garbage. Well, someone out there is praying for a husband. Complaining about the financial strain of your child(ren) because you are having to raise them alone? Someone is desperately praying for a child(ren).
I'm sure (I know) I have fallen short and focused on what my child didn't have or doesn't have but, I hope as each day passes I can choose to focus on what I do have instead. For example, one Christmas we were flooded out of our house so we had to have Christmas at my parents. I had decorated a little tree and had everything set up in one little corner for my baby boy. I was so upset becasue that's not how I thought he should spend Christmas. I wanted him to wake up and walk into his living room to see what Santa had brought. I didn't want him to wake up in a fluffy, pink bed on Christmas morning. I was devasted. My oldest brother told me later, "Laurie, he doesn't know the difference." That's not what I wanted to hear but it was true. My little boy was still going to have Christmas. He was still going to have presents under HIS tree but I chose to focus on what we didn't have, our home.
I have a healthy, wonderful, big hearted, beautiful, happy little boy. I have a job that allows me to provide for this little boy, alone. Why complain about what others don't do and focus on what I (you) CAN DO? I have a home that provides shelter for me and my son. It's not a mansion but it is a HOME. I have a vehicle that is realiable. I have so many blessings that I forget and take for granted some days. It is a blessing to be able to raise my little boy. It is a blessing that God chose me to be his mom. It is a blessing that God has given me the strength to fight through the hard days so that I can experience the good days.
We need to take our eyes off of what we don't have and focus on what we do have. If you have a trashcan full of garbage, that means you acutally have something to throw in it. There are people who don't have that privledge. If your husband left his shoes by the bed and you tripped over them, you are blessed. You have a husband AND he owns a pair of shoes. Maybe you are tired and weary because you are raising your child(ren) alone, you are blessed. There are women who long to have a child. Be careful about your complaints because there are so many who would love to "complain" about what you have because they don't have it.
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