This has been on my heart for quite some time now. I never know exactly how to put it in words but I'm certainly going to try.
Addiction hit very close to home 14 years ago. It rocked my world. Forever changed it. I didn't want to learn about it. I didn't want to experience it. I most definitely didn't want to live with it.
I've heard it all. I've heard things that I wish I could erase from my memory. I've seen it all. Things that I wish would disappear from my mind forever. But it's there. Every single day of my life.
What a waste.
What a waste of talent.
They are better off dead.
They are selfish.
They are no good.
They are trash.
Why can't they get right?
Why don't they just stop?
If they wanted to quit, they could.
I don't understand.
They choose drugs over everything.
They choose drugs over their kids.
I could go on and on and on. I've learned and I have studied addiction over the years. I don't understand it but I have witnessed it. Addiction itself is selfish. It will destroy anyone that it wants to destroy. Addicts are also selfish. They don't think about anything but their next high. Do I think they want to live this life? I don't.
I don't think that anyone wakes up and says, "Hey, I think I will ruin my life today and the life of those I love."
What I know is that a recovering addict worries about staying sober. That is their #1 goal. Maybe you've heard the song, One Day at a Time. Those lyrics flowed from the mouth of someone that was crying out for help. That song later became a best selling song. Written by... you guessed it... an addict.
Why is sobriety so important? If someone isn't sober, they are worthless to anyone around them. Sometimes they have to do things that many don't understand just to keep their sobriety. It may seem selfish. It may even look bad to the world around them. But what many don't understand, it's their only choice to stay sober.
So why? Why can't they get right? Why can't they just quit?
I heard a recovering addict years ago say it best and I'm going to use God's word to explain it to you.
Romans 7
14 We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. 15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[c] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
That's it in a nutshell.
So next time you want to degrade an addict. Next time you see the "crackhead" begging for money on the side of the road. Next time the addict is arrested. Next time the addict makes another bad decision. Instead of judging them or talking about them... how about praying for them. Sound easy enough?
Because you see... the addiction that has them wrapped... is like the gossip that spews from your mouth. You could stop... if you wanted... but you don't. You continue to talk. You continue to gossip. You continue to slander. But you say... it's not like addiction... argue what you want but if you wanted to stop, you could. Right?
When I see an addict walking down the road... I see someone's son... someone's daughter... I see someone's dad... I see someone's mother... I see someone's brother... I see someone's sister... I see someone's friend... I see someone that is desperate to numb the pain of life.
We just never know the story. Why they even tried it in the first place.
So why do I find myself always defending the addict? Because that addict has been someone that I loved. That addict has been the father of my son. That addict has been my brother. That addict has been my uncle. That addict has been my cousin. The addict has been me.
Romans 7... Read it. Meditate on it. Learn from it.
That all made a lot of sense to me as an addict in recovery myself so thanks for taking the time to say these wise words and showing me the words out of the Bible that made me think .We do everything we can to stay clean but we did even more to get high ,it was the sin in us that made it so hard to just stop and I wish people some people understood or even cared.My dad never did but mom did .She saw me sober and happy for over a year,and even told my new wife at the time that she didn’t worry anymore so that meant everything.I married Tammy a month before she passed and Tammys mother passed 9 days later of cancer too.I had a relapse 3 years ago but have taken Care of her otherwise and I’m proud of that cause before I couldn’t even take care of myself before sobriety.
ReplyDelete